A Woman's Prerogative

Recently, one of my close friends enthusiastically recommended a new restaurant. Of course, I had to ask her what she and her date had. It sounded good. But just to make sure I'd like the restaurant, I went to their website and looked at their menu. Seemed good. Then, I called another friend and asked her what she heard about the restaurant. She also enjoyed it. I looked for reviews and after reading several positive ones; I recommended to Bill that we give the restaurant a try.

When one of Bill's friends recommends a restaurant, they rarely recommend anything "enthusiastically." He goes to the restaurant. He doesn't exert the time and energy I do before deciding to try a restaurant. That's because men and women make decisions differently.

Getting back to the new restaurant ... after taking my time looking at the menu, I changed my mind three times before making a final decision about what to have for a main course. I probably would've changed it again if Bill hadn't blurted out, "This isn't the last time you're going to eat out. Just decide before I die of starvation!"

Jeez, it's a good thing I looked at the menu online. Otherwise, it would've taken me longer to decide!

A Man, A Woman ... And A Decision

When a man is faced with making a decision, he takes in information and moves forward in a linear fashion until he thinks that he has found a good solution. It's because a man uses one side of his brain at a time, which makes him very good at focusing.

A woman makes decisions differently. She makes decisions in a spiral manner. After she takes in the initial information, she might consider making a decision, but she'll spiral back to get more information to validate that consideration. She'll continue this process until she feels she's found the perfect answer.

This female decision-making process can be attributed to several factors:

• A woman uses both sides of her brain simultaneously, causing her to bring emotional feelings as well as functional data to the decision-making process.
• A woman has more emotional outposts in her brain than a man. So, she'll bring her life experiences into the decision-making process. She'll also consider how she felt when she made a decision in a similar situation.
• Because of genetic memory, women are very good storytellers. They enjoy telling -- and hearing -- stories. So, when she makes a decision, she's also taking into consideration what type of story she'll be able to tell about her decision.

If you're attempting to get more women customers, remember that she'll use a spiral decision-making process. To assist her in decision-making, be sure to reach her using multiple touch-points:

• Use broadcast to get her attention and motivate consideration.
• Use your website to share data that will assist her in validating her consideration.
• Let her hear stories from other women by having a message board or posting testimonials on your website.

How does this gender difference in decision-making affect your relationships?

Guys, don't lose patience with your wife when she's taking a long time to make a decision ... it's part of her female brain-wiring. And, it's why she'll change her mind several times before deciding what to order for dinner at her favorite restaurant.

Ladies, the next time your husband says he needs to go to the mall to buy a pair of pants, don't offer to accompany him thinking that you'll be able to shop around while he's buying his pants. He's going to be at the mall a very short time. He'll walk into the store, walk over to the pants rack, pick out the style, color and size he needs, pay and leave ... in and out in less than 30 minutes. Guaranteed. This will not be enough time for you to shop.

However, women spend more time than men in the "Anticipation" and "Recollection" phases. Let's get back to the "new restaurant" experience.

Before Bill and I went:

• I talked to other people who had eaten there, looked at the online menu and anticipated what I would enjoy.
• Bill said "OK."

At the restaurant:
* Bill and I both enjoyed the atmosphere, food, drinks and service.

After the restaurant:

• The day after dining out, I called my friend who initially recommended the restaurant and told her all about my dining experience. This included a review of the decor, food, service and ladies room. Of course, I had to share a story about the couple sitting next to us who appeared to be on a first date. Then, I e-mailed several other friends and recommended the restaurant.
• The day after dining out, Bill went to a client meeting. When he returned to the office, I asked him, "Wasn't that a fabulous restaurant we went to last night? Did you love the salmon? Wasn't that nice of Joanne to recommend it?" He replied, "Yep"... which pretty much sums up a man's "Recollection" phase.

For your brand to make a relevant connection with women, it must address all 3 phases of life experiences.