Who Helped You?

Success is never singular, nor is it necessarily permanent. Webster defines success as "the accumulation of possessions or the attainment of a position of power, prestige or fame." Okay, I'm down with that except to say those things can be indicative of our success but they are not necessarily "success" in themselves.

Look around: how many eminently successful people have you known who never attained appreciable net worth, a lofty corporate position or national recognition? They simply quietly raised a family, and worked tirelessly influencing someone else's career (possibly yours).

I write this week's column twelve hours before the Super Bowl. This weekend Falcons quarterback Matt Ryan was named the league's MVP ... most valuable player in the most prestigious fraternity of sport in America. How and why did Ryan arrive here? Youth league coaches, high school coaches, four years at Boston College, on to the NFL where initially Ryan was a good-not-great quarterback. In this long chain of influence, Ryan "sees the whole field," acknowledging with humility his good fortune of having been influenced by so many caring people along the way, right up to the present moment when head coach Kyle Shanahan and quarterback coach extraordinaire Matt LaFleur molded and chiseled Ryan to his apogee as a Super Bowl quarterback and the league's most valuable player.

Look at your own career, but don't begin with your current position or title. Reel back over the sun-and-honey days of your childhood (and let's hope they were). Parents and grandparents, teachers, little league or cheerleading coaches, orchestra teachers, tutors, counselors, even neighbors who believed in you, touching your path to success, however you define it. Cervantes wrote, "The journey is better than the inn." Your mentoring trammeled with experiences of success and heartbreak along the way was the "journey." The trophies, the ribbons, a score, or a job promotion, is simply "the inn."

When we see it this way, names and faces twist like vines through our pantheon of experiences, past and present. Like Matt Ryan, we can bask in the appreciation for everyone who mattered ... who took the time to spend an extra hour with us, coach our technique, be honest enough to critique our shortcomings, and stand there at the goal line with applause.

Through this introspection it becomes crystal clear; the winners' stand is exhilarating. But it's the journey and the people who helped make it possible that matter most.

When you're on a plane, alone in your study, or in the small hours when it's quiet and time stands still, recall a few people who helped define you, inspire you, and maybe opened the gates of success. Then call them and tell them "thanks." It's what true MVPs do when they look back on their life and career. It's easy to say "thanks" and arguably more important for you than for them.